The Simple Connection

Ever wondered why everything that you have done, chosen or decided in the past ends up casting its shadow somewhere in the present? Long after it's been done with? Long after you've moved on from it?

Well, I tend to notice it pretty often in whatever that happens with me... As they say, wounds heal, scars remain. The scars are always visible... Sometimes, they fade... But, some part of them, prevails, no matter what.

It makes me wonder as to why is it that long after we make our choices, take our decisions, are done with the actions concerned, why do they reappear? Why do they ricochet into our lives? How? And for what reason? Most of the times, we tend to see the wrong decisions and choices more prominently, may be because that's something we regret.

But, the underlying question remains the same. Static. What's the connection? What's the reason for these ricochets? Why does the past rebound? Mostly when you've completely forgotten about them. Is it never-ending?

We are always told to learn from the past, and move on into the present for a better future. Makes sense, doesn't it? But, looking into it deeper, makes me realize that this is quite an impossible request! How can you completely ignore something that's responsible for shaping your present the way it is? How can you completely let go of a mistake when that affects the people you love? How can you just let go off someone just because of a stupid decision you made? How can things change so fast and quickly in such times? Our behaviour, mood, attitude, all swings into the past, in the feel of the event and... Voila! Just when you thought you were through, you're sucked back into the whirlwind of the past!!

A never-ending story, is it?

It's amusing to me how the human tendency is so attractive. It kind of attracts just what you want to repel. That's even what The Secret told me about. But what about the past? What's its connection with the present except that it was the present at one time?

It's pretty simple, but vivid.

Imagine the best player of a sport, and how he would want to bask in the days of his glory long even after he has completely retired from the sport... Imagine someone jailed on a life-term, in view of his first crime ever... And imagine yourselves in the best and worst moments of your life...

All of these have one thing in common. The extreme feeling. For the sports star, it's glory, pride. For the prisoner, it's guilt, regret. And for you and me, it's happiness, sadness.

And here comes another question. Why do we lose ourselves to so many moments and things of the past then? We couldn't have felt the extreme string of emotions every time... Or we could've?

Now, I'm no psychologist or psychiatrist to tell you the exact reason. This is stuff I feel is real...

I believe that every emotion, every feeling is extreme in the moment and that's the best you can have it as, for that particular moment. I believe, it's like, the intensity of these are plotted against a graph of time, and the most prominent ones among these, for every particular time span, tend to be a moment of our present... Of the reality we face...

We don't remember every single moment of our childhood with our parents, neither do they remember every moment with us. But, we remember those when the feelings were far more extreme... Every emotion, for that matter. Love, care, amusement, happiness, sadness, fear, anxiety... Each and every feeling. And I'm sure, each one of us does distinctly remember one such event from the early childhood of 10 the first years, if not more... The simple reason being the strange, sudden spur of emotions at that very moment... That wasn't a part of the rest...

The last part of the question, that bothers me... What if a decision, choice didn't make me feel very weirdly huge about the moment, but, it did to someone else who was a part of it? Will it still turn back and find its way back in my life? Somehow, for some reason, I find this happening more frequently that the rest. We have a control over the events we remember. But, being reminded of the events more concerned with someone else, we don't! It's their memory, their thoughts that would bring it back, if it ever does.

I have read and heard that there's some sort of an energy network between people, which even transmits feelings... When such things happen, when the past suddenly pops out into the present, it just highlights and strengthens this theory...

It's troubling to end up realizing that the mistake you made, has hurt someone terribly, and being reminded of it again, does no good. Similarly, being reminded through someone's thoughts that you've done something really good to them may just end up making you complacent! Either ways, it can't be avoided. Either ways, it can't be accepted completely. Because, staying in the past, we can't bring about a change in the present.

And let's face it. No matter how hard or strong you are, portray to be, there are those moments which when return from deep within memories, make you smile between tears... Which make you feel completely worthless, guilty... Which make you feel extremely scared, lost... Which make you feel the sudden calm...

There's something very peculiar about this simple connection... Peculiar, but, real.

Feel the simple connection, it's bound to teach, tell you a lot many things that you may once have ignored...

Adios!

P.S.: I know many of you must be wondering the timing of this blog as it comes less than 200 minutes before my 5th HSC Board paper... But, this one had been on my mind since quite some time now, and I just had to write it down today after the events that occured through it...